Running a wart clinic – warts and all

When my patients used to come to me for advice about warts, I used to jokingly say that when I was young they were potentially fatal. Once they had recovered from the shock, I would explain that when I was at school you would be inspected before entering the swimming pool and, if warts were detected, you would not be allowed to swim. Hence, you never learned to swim, so your risk of drowning in later life increased. Needless to say, you have to select those of your patients whom you know to have a sense of humour.